Week 18 update (8.4.2008)

Raw

Mike Adamle (the new GM of Raw) makes confusing matches:

1. CM Punk vs. JBL vs. Chris Jericho - if JBL or Jericho wins, they get to face Punk for the belt at SummerSlam. If Punk wins, neither of them gets a shot at the PPV. JBL got the pin at the last second, as there was a 10-minute time limit. The time limit was the best thing about the match, and should be utilized more often. This forces the match to have a more urgent pace, and spots like the heel hanging out outside of the ring for a nine-count are eliminated.

Kofi Kingston defeated Paul Burchill to keep his IC belt. Post-match, Katie Lea was left in the ring, and was joined by Mickie James, who defeated Burchill and was then beaten down by Beth Phoenix. At the top of the ramp, both Santino and Phoenix patted each other on the butt. The two of them then confronted Adamle, who created another bizarro match for SummerSlam:

2. Mickie James & Kofi vs. Phoenix & Santino, the stip being whichever team wins gets BOTH belts. Pretty cool, actually.

Kane destroyed Matt Striker and talked about how "he's dead." Still, that bag . . .

Jamie Noble kept trying to impress Layla backstage, and when Layla had a random dancing-in-the-ring segment, she was interrupted by Regal, who was in turn attacked by Noble. Wouldn't mind seeing these two have some stiff, stiff matches. Jamie Noble is a pitbull, remember?

Main event saw Cena & Batista team up against Rhodes & DiBiase for the tag-team belts. Cena & Batista won, and have to defend them next week, so let's hope that they lose the belts in an effort to cause some tension going into their match at SummerSlam.

Decent show, ovreall.

ECW

I guess Striker recovered quickly from his Kane-induced beatdown, because he's the new color guy on ECW, filling in for Tazz, who is filling in on Smackdown for the driven-through-a-table-by-Edge Mick Foley. Whew. He was decent, and clearly knows his shit.

Mike Knox called out Finaly, again, who came to the ring with Hornswoggle and gave Knox a free shot, but Knox didn't take it, instead leaving the ring. OK.

Estrada finally got his contract by defeating, yep, Tommy Dreamer. Delaney caused the distraction that got Estrada the win, so he and Dreamer are competing in an Extreme Rules match this coming week. OK.

Newly-fired Braden Walker defeated James Curtis (AKA KC James, former tag partner of Idol Stevens). OK.

Bam Neeley & Chavo took on Evan Bourne and Ricky Ortiz in an OK match. Faces got the win, but us here at the Stunt Granny still aren't very impressed with Ortiz. I guess he's big or whatever, but really likes Chin Locks.

Main "Event" was a live edition of the Dirt Sheet, Miz & Morrison's wwe.com show-thing. It was very, very unfunny, and culminated with Mark Henry and Matt Hardy beating down the former tag champs.

This show earned a very large MEH.

Smackdown

So throughout the show, Hawkins, Ryder, & Bam Neeley were all found beaten up around the arena. In addition, they all had black roses left next to their pummeled bodies. Has to be the Undertaker, right? WRONG. Of course, it turned out to be Edge, who brought out Vickie and Chavo at the end of the show to take on 'Taker. Edge ended up giving a Con-Chair-To to Chavo and going bonkers on Vickie, tipping over her wheelchair and getting in her face all insane-like.

Again, cool to see Edge super intense, but the PPV is in a week, so it's kind of lost on me.

The "Great" Khali took on HHH (in his first appearance since welcoming a new daughter into the world) in this lame arm-wrestling match. Thing is, it wasn't just any arm-wrestling match: there was glass on the table where your arm would get pinned down!!! Of course, this didn't happen, because Khali got frustrated, beat up HHH, and squished his head in the VICE.

Great match between Jeff Hardy and Shelton was interrupted by MVP kicking Hardy in the head (like he did on Saturday Night's Main Event, I guess) to fuel the fire for their impending SummerSlam match. Why couldn't there have been a clean finish with a post-match beatdown? Let Shelton pick up a cheap, clean win as the heel US Champ, and have MVP pick the bones!

Six-diva tag-team match saw all six ladies dressed up different Olympic-themed outfits, and the heels got the win when Natalya made Maria submit with a Sharpshooter. Fun little match, and we got to see Victoria's finisher, the Widow's Peak. So brutal:



Hawkins & Ryder defeated the newly-fired Shannon Moore and (non-fired) Jimmy Wang Yang. Good to see those two back in tag action . . . oops.

Kozlov came out with his new, lame entrance and demanded better competition. Jesse & Festus answered the call and Jesse got his ass handed to him. Post-match, Kozlov stared down the dopey Festus.

The Brian Kendrick defeated . . . Super Crazy?! Not only is Super Crazy a lot heavier than he used to be, but he wrestled in an ECW t-shirt over his singlet. Huh? Of course, Kendrick got the win. He needs a feud, fast.

Overall, decent week for wrestling.

The Stunt Granny is going on vacation from Thursday to Monday this week, so I'll get my official SummerSlam predictions in this week!